Yesterday, I returned to the silver screen after a prolonged layoff, “Ah, Hollywood, seduce me with a story;” to view the final episode of Star Wars, Rise of Skywalker in 3-D. Ironically, it was the last time the 3-D edition was playing. The boy behind the glass, with the mic, (Funny how this has not changed) looked to be a fanboy, with his black rimmed glasses, pale complexion, weight, and haircut. I once heard, “I’m not racist, but I stereotype, it’s faster.” “Have you seen it,” I asked. A slow head movement up and a seriousness of the situation set in, he locked eyes with me, through what appeared to be bullet proof glass, “Yeah, 4 times.”
I willingly forked over the $14.75 in anticipation of the lazy-boy chairs my friends had talked up and was handed disposable 3-D glasses. With a running time of 2hrs and 22mins, I hit the bathroom to ensure an uninterrupted Force experience in a galaxy far, far, away. But before I jumped to light speed, a $6.14 Sprite was purchased and I felt the economic pain, only as an old man can, “Cripes.”
My friends arrived, as I sipped my carbonated lemon lime delight and ushered me toward theater number 1 in haste. Not because it was start time, it was, but because they had bypassed the teenage security and scored a free show. They asked, “What seat are you in?” This was my first experience to assigned seating in a movie theater, I felt like yelling seat check, the teenager resurfacing, luckily, the 4:10 show was not full and we had center seating. Jake, my buddy, pulls out a bottled water and says, “Free refills Stu,” I busted up laughing. Instantly, I was transported back in time, my mom sneaking me and my sister, Brianne, Cokes and candy, into Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, 1990, to avoid the strain on a single mother’s purse.
Rise of Skywalker, in 3-D IMAX, with D-Box, digital sound, and stadium seating, is like riding in a 2020 Tesla Millennium Falcon; including a faded Han Solo, giving me that, “Hey, it’s me” look, than yelling at Chewy, but what the heck is IMAX? “The IMAX film standard uses 70 mm film run through the projector horizontally. This technique produces an area that is nine times larger than the 35 mm format, and three times larger than 70 mm film which was run conventionally through the projector in a vertical orientation,” oh, ok, thanks Wikipedia, and D-Box? “D-BOX is a seating concept that adds motion right in your seat! Moviegoers will be immersed in an unmatched, hyper-realistic entertainment experience that moves the body and sparks the imagination through motion.”
The D-BOX black leather recliners, with remote control settings, definitely impressed me! Jake told me he got up at one point, because he started to fall asleep from the lulling comfort. The iconic, 3 stanza, yellow lettering began scrolling and Jake, pointed it out, that the studio had actually made this suggestion, not Lucas, so the viewer could have better context. A great call for an unexpected audience of 1977.
I immediately felt a sense of euphoria and was immersed in the film, as fly boy, Poe, the new “Han”, piloted the Millennium Falcon with the usual suspects, Chewy, and Finn, puddle jumping through light speed, to lose the First Order. They hooked-up with Rey and she began to get on Poe’s case, why, the Falcon was on fire from his irresponsible, shoot from the hip, light speed risk. My body, calming from the anxiety of the escape, was led right back to an old chapter, Han and Leia, getting under each other’s skin, and making movie chemistry. The same banter and physical characteristics, resonated in the back in forth, “What’d you do to my droid,” and Rey, Stands with Fists, “What’d you do to the Falcon.”
Rey, the last hope of the Jedi, still, has been honing in her powers, since the escape of The Last Jedi. She opens her 3rd film floating, meditating, with large rocks, similar to the ones removed from the last scene of episode 8, feeling, “Tired,” she confides in Leia, after running the training course. The Jedi to be; performs phenomenal moves through the lush green background of the forest standing out, in her white robe Jedi attire, until her focus was busted. D-O finds his droid butt stuck under a tree, due to her haste, acting like a lumber jack, with Luke’s lightsaber. The new films have depicted her powers to an extreme, in my opinion. I just couldn’t stomach her being able to battle Kylo Ren, genetic gold, trained by the best, then, the galaxies most feared warrior, on her first attempt! But, some would say, the case would be made later with the discovery of her family lineage, tomato, tomato.
Solo, I mean, Kylo Ren, meets Rey in the desert after she performs a Street Fighter II move, reminiscent, of Chun-Li, bolting from the chase of his fighter, leaping upside down, slicing the wing clean, with her blue lightsaber. Ren’s cockpit tumbles in the sand but he walks away to engage Rey, in a force battle, to hold an escaping ship, supposedly housing chewy. They struggle until electricity shoots from her hands like Raiden, in MKII, and the ship is engulfed in gravity and fire. Finn’s repeated requests, for her safety, sets in, and she retreats.
Rumors of Emperor Palpatine’s near death experience are confirmed, he lives, in Exegol, and Luke was close to the secret destination, but the instructions were lost with the dagger they found, now in Chewy’s custody. Messing around on Pasaana, they run into that hustler, Lando Calrissian, Billy D people, clap! He nudges them in the right direction; instead of choose your adventure. I felt Shia in the movie with the dagger twist, something out of transformers. Rey than looks through the dagger, once reacquired, like a thundercat or Goonie, to battle extreme waves, retrieve the Sith way-finder, a black pyramid with a red dot in it, that guides on to Exegol.
But, alas, her ex-boyfriend, from another dimension, Kylo, foils her plans, smashing the Sith way-finder; glory of the warrior spirit ensues. Lightsaber’s clasp, rogue waves crash on a depleted Death Star, Rey and Solo have their duel. “Take my hand,” Kylo, repeats, “Rule by my side,” but Rey doubts her future, conflicted, a common burden of a Jedi Knight. She craves to be heard, “The Jedi’s, I can’t hear their voices from the past,” admittedly, almost sheepishly, looking away from Leia’s prying eyes earlier. The scavenger, orphan, from Jakku, “Yea, that’s pretty much nowhere,” Luke told us, is the most in-tune, gifted, kind, and dangerous Jedi we’ve ever seen. She leaps through the waves, lands on one knee with a thunderous boom, “Wait I’ve seen this before,” borrowing is a sign of flattery, ok, and she rocks the shit out of Kylo Ren. Just watching that scene, in 3-D IMAX, with D-BOX, was worth the ticket price, times two!
I’ll reframe from giving away any further spoilers and wrap this sucker up. The biggest negative that sticks out was the comedy, it just didn’t land. Not that Star Wars needs it, but we’ve become accustomed in the other 2 movies to some relief. The only funny character; Guardians of the Galaxy rip off, operated on C-3PO, had the only moments of witticism.
Overall, The Rise of Skywalker delivered. The terrific shot of a Star Destroyer blowing up from inside of the con, to Kylo Ren, leaving a battlefield in waste, as the dark side grows into his spoiled brat demeanor the writers have branded him with. Leia, stands fast anchoring the trilogy, but Finn seems lost in the plot; acting like a little girl, crying for Rey the whole movie. The plot had twists I was not expecting, which was so refreshing after the ridiculous, Last Jedi, scenario of, “We’re running out of gas and can’t jump to light speed.” The similarities to the Return; are many. I feel the old man crankiness of Randal, from Clerks II, “There’s only one Return, and it ain’t of the king!” I understand the need to connect old fans with familiar story lines; triggering the nostalgia in adults, enabling recall of their childhood joy. The Rise of Skywalker conveys this feeling, while engaging the youth with some reinvigorating story-telling, enabling this trilogy to stand on the same playing field as the original.
